Is your feedback psychologically safe?
Feedback conversations are powerful. They can be a wonderful or terrible experience for all parties involved. So how can we ensure we provide feedback to our colleagues and teams in a psychologically safe manner?
Valuable feedback focuses on learning and development. It aims to help the feedback receiver grow and develop their skills and awareness, to make changes to their practice in ways that creates a win-win for everyone.
However, we have all had negative experiences on the end of feedback that has been negative or even traumatic. Feedback should never be shaming, humiliating or an opportunity to put someone down. Many people have experienced Learning Trauma; traumatised by experiences where we should have been safe to learn, but instead we were on the receiving end of shame, humiliation or put downs.
To ensure we do not add further to the trauma our colleagues may have experienced in past learning situations, we need to enhance our skills in giving feedback.
Feedback can focus on 4 different things:
It can be about the person - when we judge or criticise the person who is not meeting our standards
It can focus on what is unwanted, focussing on the behaviours, approach or attitude that we do not want
It can focus on what is wanted, focussing on the behaviours, approach or attitude that we want
Ultimately, we want feedback to be focussed on the learning, on the skills, awareness, or insight that the person needs to understand to enhance their professional and personal skill-base not meeting our standards.
We can call this last type ‘stretch feedback’ - it helps to stretch us, helps us learn, grow and develop. This feedback does not strain or shame us or add to our learning trauma.
Tips for cultivating and delivering 'Stretch' feedback
Sanctuary of safety: Imagine feedback as a sacred space, one where vulnerability can flourish. Choose private settings that foster trust and openness. We should feel safe sharing and learning, void of any fear.
Blueprint for progress: Don't just point out the gaps—hand them the tools to bridge those gaps. Offer actionable advice, strategies they can implement, and steps they can take immediately. Your role as a guide amplifies their development.
Reflection breeds insight: Empower your colleague by posing open-ended questions that encourage self-reflection. Self-assessment encourages ownership of growth and triggers the gears of introspective learning.
Precision in feedback: When you offer feedback, precision is your guiding light. Be surgical in your observations, focusing on the actions and behaviours that can be seen and measured. Avoid vague generalities and instead, dissect the specific instances that matter.
Skills or behaviour over character: Remember, you're not critiquing someone's essence, but rather the choices they make and the actions they take. Stick to discussing skills, behaviours and outcomes, steering clear of making sweeping judgments about their character.
The art of balance: Feedback is a dance between celebration and guidance. Take care to celebrate skills, strengths and accomplishments while also providing the gift of constructive critique. Balance nurtures growth, reminding professionals that improvement is part of the journey.
Beyond feedback: the ongoing conversation: Feedback isn't a one-time affair; it's a continuum. Make it a habit to circle back and assess progress. Equally vital, provide them with resources—courses, materials, workshops—that fan the flames of their evolution.
In this dance of feedback, remember that you're not just imparting information; you're nurturing growth, fostering evolution, and championing the journey of your colleagues. Your words have the power to shape destinies—so speak wisely and with heart.
Join my Feedback Conversations Masterclass
Giving and receiving feedback can be the trickiest conversations we have to navigate at work. To learn how to provide empowering and constructive feedback, register for my next masterclass on 30 October 2023.
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Don't forget to look out for my next blog article, which will explore ways to receive feedback well.