Are you Choosing Kindness?
What have you noticed about the tone on social media and online platforms lately?
This is the second newsletter Nichola and I have written together. We wrote this in response to the shift we have recently noticed in the tone online. We've seen a little more criticism, judgement and lack of kindness. We are also hearing that online engagement now carries a sense of uncertainty, as people are unsure whether they will encounter thoughtful discussion or criticism and negativity. As we both work with individuals and teams and participate in professional online spaces, this is an issue we have been reflecting on together.
Why this matters now
It is also important to name the broader climate in which this is occurring. Many people are carrying heightened emotional load, uncertainty, and grief, including in the wake of deeply distressing events both local and abroad.
We're also aware of the significant professional load we are carrying, as many of the systems we work within are chronically underfunded and under-resourced, adding to moral injury and ongoing frustration. These contexts shape how we respond to one another, particularly in fast-moving online environments where nuance and relationships are harder to hold.
In times like these, how we engage matters as much as what we say. Each interaction creates ripples that extend far beyond the immediate exchange, shaping not only individual wellbeing but the collective field we all inhabit.
Is kindness a professional capability?
We reflected on kindness as an important professional capability that supports psychological safety, ethical leadership, and sustainable practice. When emotions and frustrations run high, when systems feel under impossible strain, and when real-world events amplify fear, anger, or helplessness, responding with care, curiosity, and responsibility becomes essential.
In this newsletter, we invite you to pause and explore how kindness can be a deliberate, evidence-informed choice that protects individuals, strengthens professional communities, and supports more meaningful dialogue.
Take a moment to consider:
Where do you most see kindness in your professional life?
Who are the role models of kindness in your team or workplace?
What specific behaviours, attitudes and interactions most exemplify kindness?
How do you embody kindness? Towards yourself? Towards others?
Where could kindness be strengthened in your professional world?
What would shift if we viewed our professional community as a living system where each person's energy and presence affect the whole?
The evidence for kindness
Kindness and respectful conduct are not optional interpersonal qualities, but core contributors to safe and effective practice.
Evidence from healthcare research consistently shows that kindness is associated with better care experiences, stronger trust and rapport between health professionals and the people with whom they work, and improved collaboration across teams. At an organisational level, respectful workplace cultures are linked with higher employee satisfaction, stronger teamwork, lower turnover, and enhanced productivity (Hutchinson et al., 2023).
These principles are embedded in professional standards, including the Allied Health Practitioner Regulation Agency's (AHPRA, 2022) and National Alliance of Self-Regulating Health Professionals' (NASRHP, 2024) Codes of Conduct, which recognise that our professional relationships directly impact the quality of care our clients receive.
Evidence from healthcare research also consistently shows that kindness and respectful conduct are not optional interpersonal qualities, but core contributors to safe and effective practice. Kindness is associated with better care experiences, stronger trust and rapport between health professionals and the people with whom they work, and improved collaboration across teams. At an organisational level, respectful workplace cultures are linked with higher employee satisfaction, stronger teamwork, lower turnover, and enhanced productivity (Hutchinson et al., 2023).
Conversely, exposure to incivility, bullying, and other unkind behaviours is associated with increased lack of psychological safety, psychological distress, burnout, moral injury, and reduced workforce sustainability.
From intention to action
Kindness does not mean avoiding difficult issues or silencing frustration. It means engaging in ways that reduce harm, support learning, and strengthen professional connections and communities. At its deepest level, kindness is not just what we do, but the quality of presence and consciousness we bring to every interaction.
The following practices offer practical ways to translate intention into action.
For individuals
Use your influence mindfully
Before sharing or responding, pause and ask yourself: Is what I am about to say kind, useful, or constructive? Does this post contribute positively to the conversation? Choosing to inform, connect, or uplift rather than vent publicly protects both your wellbeing and your professional integrity.
Move from complaint to contribution
Frustration is often valid, especially within stretched systems. Where possible, shift from naming problems alone to offering questions, insights, or potential solutions. This helps keep conversations future-focused and supports collective problem-solving rather than escalation.
Engage with empathy
When responding to others, ask: How can I help this person feel seen and respected, even if I disagree? Kindness online often looks like listening carefully, acknowledging complexity, and responding without minimising or dismissing another's experience.
Reflect on alignment
Periodically check whether your online presence reflects your offline values. Ask: Is my digital behaviour consistent with the kind of professional I aim to be? This alignment supports self-leadership, credibility, and trust across all spaces you occupy.
Notice and celebrate others
Actively acknowledging the work, insights, or kindness of colleagues strengthens community wellbeing. Small acts of recognition contribute to a culture where generosity and respect are normalised rather than exceptional.
For leaders and workplaces
Model the tone you want to see
Leaders shape culture through everyday behaviour. How you speak about colleagues, organisations, and challenges, both online and offline, signals what is acceptable and what is valued.
Support reflective practice
Use supervision, team reflection, and facilitated conversations to help staff process emotional load, ethical tension, and systemic frustration safely. This reduces reactivity and strengthens thoughtful engagement.
Set clear expectations for online conduct
Explicitly name respectful communication, accountability, and psychological safety as shared responsibilities. This includes guidance about online behaviour, professional forums, and public commentary connected to work roles.
Create safe pathways for concerns
When people lack trusted ways to raise concerns internally, frustration is more likely to spill into public spaces. Clear, responsive processes for feedback and escalation reduce the need for reactive or harmful disclosure.
Address unkind behaviour early
Low-level incivility, if ignored, can quickly become normalised. Addressing concerns early, proportionately, and respectfully protects individuals and reinforces shared standards.
Kindness as practice
Every interaction shapes culture. The tone we bring to professional conversations, particularly in online spaces, matters deeply. Kindness, expressed through restraint, curiosity, and respect, helps ensure that even difficult issues can be discussed in ways that sustain trust and collective learning.
When we are confronted with distressing events or unkind behaviour, small, deliberate acts of care can have a stabilising effect. They shape how safe our workplaces feel, how connected our communities remain, and how we show up for one another with dignity and responsibility.
Kindness is not only a professional capability, but a practice that sustains us in working life and in the broader world we move through each day. The tone we bring to professional conversations, including in online spaces, matters. As we each choose kindness, we participate in something larger; transforming not just our immediate environments, but the very fabric of the professional communities we collectively create.
If you would like to read more…
Christine Porath believes incivility is typically not an intentional behaviour, but that it is related to self-awareness, and the primary driver of incivility is stress. In the Wellbeing Lab’s Podcast, The Cost of Incivility, you can listen to Christine share strategies on buffering the negative effects of incivility and building more civil organisations. She has also written a book called Mastering Civility: A Manifesto for the Workplace.
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Relevant previous newsletters you may be interested in…
Kindness is not only a professional capability, but a practice that sustains us in working life and in the broader world we move through each day.